I have become a very light sleeper. All night long I am vaguely aware of my subconscious processing all of the little noises in my house and filtering them into different files labeled Keep Sleeping, Maybe You Should Check On That, and Run For Your Life. Almost all sounds fall into the first two categories, and with the kids being old enough to hop out of their beds and find me if they need me, I don’t get out of bed for much. Last night was the exception.

It is three am, and I am sleeping lightly, only a little bit aware of what’s going on. I heard the trash cans being put away outside. Normal. I heard Chris banging around in the kitchen doing dishes. Normal, and appreciated. Usually the sounds of nocturnal cleaning give me very pleasant dreams. Then I heard a voice. One of Chris’ work buddies, in for a late night snack? Abnormal, but not bad. Wait, wait- that’s a woman’s voice. There’s a chick out there!

My feet hit the floor before I was even awake. I stumbled into the kitchen to find there was indeed a chick in my house in the wee hours of the morning. It was a maintenance lady responding to Chris’ earlier phone call he placed when, apparently, he turned on the kitchen light and a shower of sparks rained down.

Now, I would never even consider than Chris had brought a woman home to cheat on me; it’s not in his character. But I had to laugh at how quickly the sound of a strange woman’s voice raised my internal alarm and woke me up!