This past week has been a trying one. Starting with some very sick children, every plan I had or task on my to do list got shoved aside and rearranged. I rescheduled a birthday party. I burned the midnight oil when I didn’t have any oil left to complete some work deadlines and to catch up a bit around the house. I’m still not caught up. This next week is going to be a flurry of activity, and I’m a little overwhelmed just thinking about it. I crafted my to do list this week and it is already two pages long, and that’s just the stuff I can remember!

I have run on so little sleep this week and on so much worry. I have wondered frequently how I am still going and handling all of my many tasks. My family and friends have warned me not to over do it, but keeping up with my very basic “must do” list is over-doing it in and of itself. One person cannot be expected to take on everything I am taking on and be successful. Thankfully, I am not taking this on alone.

It has been so very evident and clear to me that I am not alone in all of this, and that I have the help of my Father in Heaven and my Savior. There is no other explanation to why I can do these things right now. There is no explanation for why I am in good health. Life may not be a cake walk, but it is possible, and possible with a lot of joy. I am being lifted and carried and given strength far beyond my natural capacity because He is mindful of me, and charitable in His grace. I am both humbled and very grateful.

Even yesterday, which was a difficult day, was remedied by His quiet prompting and guidance. I hit a very tired, very overwhelmed wall yesterday, and finally bowed my head and turned it over to Him asking only six words, “what would thou have me do?” His answer was immediate, and reassuring. Paths opened up, ideas came to mind, and the remainder of my day and my children’s day was peaceful and happy. I ended the day feeling as though everyone’s needs had been met, and feeling more calm and capable toward the upcoming events of this week.

The Lord is so willing to help us. It is kind of sad that I am so caught up in my plans and my control that I forget to ask Him, who is so much more capable and who sees the entire plan so much more clearly, that simple question. What would thou have me do? It is unlikely that His plans will bring significant deviation from the course I’m already on if I’m doing my best to live as He would have me live already. I will probably not be told to build an ark or wander in the wilderness for forty years; it is more likely that I will be given the direction and inspiration that I need to do what I am already trying to better. Knowing this, why am I so slow to ask, and claim the direction and blessing that He is waiting to give me?

The good news is, as stubborn and controlling as I am, I am learning a little faster each time. I know that we were not meant to struggle through this life alone, and we were not sent here to fail. In even the most difficult of situations, the Lord is there to hear us, help us, and make us more than we ever thought we could be.

So much to be grateful for.