I. Am. So. Wiped. Out.

It has been years since I have felt this completely zapped and stupid. Week long viruses and 34 weeks pregnant should not be mixed. I have become almost nocturnal, and every time I think my children are on the mend, I am swiftly and painfully corrected.

Take last night for an example. I was determined to be in my bed by 11pm. This is actually quite late for “normal Leah”, but for “stayed up well past 2am every night for over a week taking care of sick youngins Leah” is early. I got the kids to bed at 8, just as my body woke up from the half-dead stupor it had been in all day. I sat down to relax and scrapbook a little bit, only to discover the the walkman feature on my phone broke, so I had no music, creative energy or motivation. I fiddled with a few bits of paper and chatted with a friend on the phone until Maggie woke up screaming an hour later.

Maggie was doing the horrible nightmare scream where they aren’t quite awake yet, cannot form words, and when you ask what is wrong, they shriek and point at absolutely nothing tangible. Poor kid. I soothed her and took her downstairs. (I always have to leave my bedroom when I have a nightmare- it is as if I feel better just leaving the “scene of the crime”). She woke up enough to acknowledge me, but not enough to use any understandable words and continued to try communication through moans, wailing and hysterical gesticulation. This is helpful behavior, no?

It took quite some time to calm her down enough to send her back to bed, and about fifteen minutes after I had her sleeping in her bed again, she woke up and crawled into my bed. Fine. I heard her whimper a lot during all of this situating herself, but busied myself elsewhere, as my presence just seemed to rile her up. At 11:15 she seemed asleep and I got ready for bed.

I moved Maggie to a pile of pillows on my floor, and within minutes she was back in bed with me. She writhed, kicked, wiggled, yelped, moaned and made sleeping impossible for me. This went on all night, even with several attempts to get her out of my bed. When my alarm went off at 7am for church I mentally cursed at it.

My husband was up, alarmingly chipper, attractive and putting on his tie. I felt like the swamp monster. I hauled myself out of the bed and Chris flipped on the light, which caused Maggie to come alive and start screaming, “NO YIGHT! NO YIGHT! TURN THE YIGHT OFF!” This is not normal Maggie behavior; apparently, her night had been rough as well.

I got rid of the light and went downstairs where I was met by Jonas, still sick. Clearly, I was not going to church. I was also not going to have a good day because of the state of exhaustion I was in, and I knew it. Since this is about the eight day in a row of this, and I’m pregnant, I burst into tears, sobbing to my husband that I just couldn’t do another completely unproductive, stupid day. He hugged me and recommended going back to bed, which was not met positively, as I really would like to get my schedule back on normal and off of nocturnal. He sympathized as best as he could while I blubbered like an idiot into his shoulder.

Maggie’s voice resonated down the stairs. She began screaming, “my ear hurts! My ear hurts!” Oh my poor baby. At this point, everything about last night clicked into focus. Chris and I dosed her with Motrin, and I snuggled with her in the bed. Both she and I were asleep within minutes, and stayed that way for a few hours. When Maggie woke up, her ear no longer hurt. I asked her to please tell me if her ear ever hurts again, and she told me, “it hurt in the night when the day went away. . .and it hurt when I was playing Jumpstart yesterday”. Basically, her ear had hurt for almost 24 hours and she never once used her words and told me, so we’ve all been completely miserable when I could have fixed the problem quickly. Unbelievable.

I have managed a few things since waking up, but aside from a swept floor, Jonas’ homework, and a pot of chicken soup boiling on the stove, it has not been an impressive day. It is now five pm, and I could go back to bed. I really need some sleep tonight, as I have caught the children’s cough and my asthma has kicked in, so now I’m a choking, wheezing, sleep deprived person. Beauty, that.

Tomorrow is another day!